My ordinary life in exaggeration...

When I was a young child, I had no friends so I created a world of my own. Now I am older and I can't leave.


The greatest job

Lara's job yesterday was the best job ever. The look on her face when she came home was beautiful. Seeing her so miserable slightly alleviated my excrutiating existence on her bathroom counter. On the other hand, she was too dejected to use me, thus prolonging my suffering. Also, she's started to use real hair gel lately. (As I stated in an earlier post, I am actually "pomade" but I refuse to use that gross word as my name.) While I feel grateful that I don't have to feel her fingers inside of me every day, I am feeling a little concerned. Will I ever make it to retire in the landfill paradise that I was promised?


The worst job...

I started a job today that I will quit tomorrow. I had bad feelings about it from the day I was interviewed, but I thought I would still try it out. I need a better job, and I need health insurance.

One reason I'm quitting is the work environment was rather unsafe. First of all, the lab is required by law (OSHA) to show three safety-training videos. One of the videos was badly damaged and they told me to just fast-forward through the parts that were all static-y. That was so illegal. Then, I was trained to do a task by someone who had been there only one week. She trained me badly and I ended up spilling di-chloro-methanol all over my clothes. Apparently, di-chloro-methanol is highly carcinogenic. A few hours later, someone else finally taught me how to close the bottles correctly.

Another reason I'm not going to stay was the people, but I don't want to go to into detail about this. I dislike most people anyway, so I guess this really wasn't a deciding factor. Also, there was a radio that was always playing a Clear Channel radio staion and I fucking abhor Clear Channel.

The work totally sucked as it involved pouring toxic solutions into bottles and shaking these bottles and separating layers of solutions. Getting up at seven was not a great perk, either.

I'm not completely unemployed since I still have two part-time jobs. I have some money saved up as well. Also, my parents have offered to provide me with health insurance until I can get coverage. So, I'm okay for now.

On a random note, their website claims that "CompuChem combines the talent and experience of our professionals with the latest instrumentation to produce quality data." Doesn't this sound like their employees are all cyborgs? (Robyn pointed this out to me when I sent her the link.) Unfortunately, I was not transformed into a man-machine on my first and last day there.