My ordinary life in exaggeration...

When I was a young child, I had no friends so I created a world of my own. Now I am older and I can't leave.

4.22.2004

Electric Youth

So I blew out the fuses of my whole building trying to recharge my plasma pump. Don't I come with an instruction manual or something? I should have paid more attention in school.
But then again, it's not like girls got to learn anything interesting. And I did find better things to do. (though admittedly that did lead to my "accident") Am I supposed to wire myself to the electricity grid? Rub myself against a socket? I need help, and it's not like any smart (or cute, or dead...) people ever come into the bookstore...
I'm sorry, I know I have been complaining a lot. I will try to improve my attitude. I still hope you ALL DIE though.


i know the future...

No i dont have a weejee board or anything but i can already see how
this summers going to go down. so schools over i think i passed
everythning and me and my lil honeybee are still buzzing around making
honey and of course sometimes stinging but not dying after like real
bees do then getting back to making honey or at least i make honey cuz
she is the queen bee. but does the queen make honey too or not? why
am I the one doing all the work? this isnt fair!! that's it! we're
fighting. oh, i can't stay mad...


4.21.2004

Actually, I hate you

Why do the living suck so much?!? I'm sick of all these stupid, squirming, sweaty people and their stupid sweaty lives. Leave me alone. I hate you. All of you. I dream of the day where you finally all die and become tolerable.
I miss my little brother. He is perhaps the only tolerable living person. Though now that I think about it, he's dead by now. Which proves my point-you all suck. Die! Arrrrrrrghhhh!


4.20.2004

hi. hi hi. hi

Ok, I haven't posted in a while. but between Robyn's visit, my birthday and a desperate, hopeless search for a new job, I've been busy. It's not as if anyone else here has been posting, either. (Moose!!!) Anyway, i haven't had much to post about. Except for this:

So, I'm driving home from work and thinking that I should probably go for a run. As I'm sitting at an intersection, I notice a really cute jogger coming towards me, and I'm totally checking her out. She gets to the street corner and starts to cross when out of nowhere this car comes along and hits her and she flies up into the air! She was actually not in too bad of a condition considering she had just gotten hit by a car. She was conscious and not visibly mangled, but definitely in shock. I gave her a blanket because it was cold and I noticed that she had a small star tattooed on her forearm. (For those of you unfamiliar with this trend, it usually means that one identifies as a lesbian, or at least did at the time they were getting tatooed.) So, my violent hatred towards the evil driver was greatly deepened as not only had she hit the very cute Duke student I was checking out, she had hurt a lesbian! Bitch!


4.08.2004

I apologize for my lack of posting last week, but I was rather distracted by the sexy things going on at Lara's place. Even though I could care less about what she does and with whom she does it, it was pretty entertaining around here until all the sexy things packed up and went back to Ohio. Also, they dragged me to a Tobacco Museum. More on that later...

Speaking about a lack of posting, whatever happened to the Moose? I miss it.


4.06.2004

customer service is hard.

Someone came into the bookstore today to complain that 'the Passion' book about the picture show was on the new fiction instead of the new nonfiction shelf. They were offended. They said that the Hillary Clinton book was on the nonfiction shelf! How come she was on the nonfiction shelf when the book about OUR LORD wasn't? The Dead do not really care about nonfiction, but I told them that the book would be moved. And then I looked and realized that there actually wasn't any book by this Hillary Clinton woman on the shelf, but the man was just using her name as a sign of all things evil.
So I killed him. Then realized that my manager might be upset with a body blocking the register. But then it was okay because this big moose with several heads wandered in and dragged the body away. I can't believe that robot sent me to work here. The Living are stupid.